Tuesday, August 24, 2010

The Wind in the Willows (SIKE!) Prairie Grass

Dear Diary,

Alex and Emelio are back in Public Libraryland, throwin' together a ragamuffin blog post once more!

This time, We Have Found It (the public library, that is) in Eureka, Kansas (okay you geeky Greekaholics, look back a couple words for the fun joke!). The library here is nice and new, and for a time we were sitting across from a young man who kept on making a strange monotonous humming noise from his greasy mouth while listening to nu-metal (probably) on his earbuds. Alex was annoyed, but Emelio couldn't stop lolling!

To pick up where we left off, we rode the Katy Trail on Day 16 for 95 miles, yowza! Like we said last time, the Katy Trail is lined with lovely towns and often follows the north bank of the Missouri River. The trail is very flat, and we were speedin' along at a speedy speed. Around 7:00pm, we hit up a trailside restaurant, cleverly called the Trailside Restaurant. To Alex's shock and awe, the T.R.'s nightly special was ONE DOLLAR HAMBURGERS WOW WOW!! He gobbled up a couple a those babies, while Emelio ate a suprisingly yummy veggie burger. They also had $0.75 drafts of Miller High Life Light (we had never heard of that beer before and simply refused to purchase it at such a devalued price in these dark economic times).

Indulging his inevitable MEAT RAGE...
and at prices unkown East of the Mississippi.

When we got back to the trail, we still had some miles to go, and ended up riding into the Heart of Darkness. With two flashlights strapped to the cockpit, Emelio took the lead. Unfortunately, Emelio gets a little skittish in the nighttime. Two things basically freaked his face: 1) a stupid idiotic 'possum bolted in front of his tire and made him squeal and 2) he thought he saw a twelve-foot spider and, in an attempt to avoid it, crashed to the ground and nearly caused Alex to crash as well. Yowza! Emelio didn't really get hurt, but we decided to camp at the next trailhead we encountered so as to avoid horrible nighttime evils.

Turns out, the next trailhead would make a magnificent campsite: right on the banks of the Missouri, with a boat ramp leading down to the river. We walked down in the moonlight to splash off our nasty sweat-and-limestone coating (Katy Trail is made up of a crushed limestone called "pug") and sit and contemplate the surroundings like a couple a freakin Platos.

We woke up bright and shiny and hit the trail hard, since we were going for a 120-mile day to make it to the evening's post! We stopped at a trailside hostel for water refills 20 miles in, and were pleasantly surprised to find a couple more bike travelers (Chris and Michelle, coming from NYC on their way to SF) emerging from the place. They were heading in the same direction as us, and we decided to spend some time together on the route.

We lined up with Chris and Michelle for a nice shot!

Chris and Michelle were mapping their route using an iPhone, and knew of a shortcut off the trail. Alex and Emelio were like, "Oh cool!" and we hopped off the Katy and into the streets. This route took us through Missouri's capital, Jefferson City (huge capitol--a scaled down replica of the one in D.C.), and along Route 50 all the way into Sedalia, MO. Even with the shortcut, we made it a 105 mile day, our FIRST CENTURY EVER!!! (century=100 miles on a bike in one day or 100 years of time if you believe in that sort of thing) If you're bad at math (Al Gore), that means 200 miles in two days, SLURPAGE!!!

We were hyper-pumped to get to Sedalia because Jacob VanSickle, local dweeb, hooked us up with sweet lodgings: HIS PARENTS' HOUSE!!! Thanks Jacob!!! We got cool showers, a great fridge to raid (including homepickled pickles and Buitoni), shelter from a nasty storm, and many many hilarious pictures of Jacob when he was a younger and even dweebier dweeb. JK we love you Jacob! And your parents THANKS Mr. and Mrs. Jacob!!

After a very relaxing mattress-y sleep, we made ourselves a hearty country-style breakfast and took a relaxing ride back onto the Katy Trail for its final 40-mile run westward. Rather than push ourselves too hard after a couple long days, we decided to end early just outside Deepwater MO, in maybe our most tantalizingly tubular campsite yet. It was basically an African safari wonderland! We saw a buttload of Great White Egrets, hawks, herons, wild turkeys, and other flying pokémon.

If this doesn't get your engine humming, then just whatever!!!

Day 19: We rode as far as Nevada (pronounced locally Nuh-VAY-duh, lol!) before really lunching. Once in Nevada, we really lunched!! Bagel and cheese (and meat for one, avocado for the other!) sammies; blueberries; gourmet macaroni and cheese salad; three peaches; seven Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls; a half-gallon of Vitamin D milk; yum wow yum yum wow!

Not long after, and against our better judgement, we walked over to the Nevada MUNICIPAL POOL!!! Alex's fourteen-inch-thick layer of back hair prevented him from sliding down the slides effectively, while Emelio's baby dives were an embarrassment to himself and the greater Nevada community. It didn't matter, because it was HOT and the pool felt AMAZING!


We crossed the border into Kansas, and ended up in the fabulous city of Fort Scott. Fabluous, that is, in spite of the fact that friggin everything shuts down on a Sunday evening. We couldn't even find a place to knock back a couple cold brews when we had such a craving! Danggg.

Gorgeous old Fort Scott. Veddy quiet.

But anyway, it was sweet to be in this historic old Western town. The main streets through the place were paved in brick, and the storefronts remain standing in all their architectural glory. There's a great story to this little town, but you'll have to wait until.............. next time!

PS: didja remember to check da LINKS?


  1. Wow! I looooooved the part where you guys REALLY lunched, because sometimes you lunch.... and sometimes you REEEEEALLY lunch! Right?

  2. haha that picture of Jacob is priceless

  3. you linked the hamburger video to the twelve foot spider...I don't get it.

  4. links are fixed. nice catch, ben.